Seven last words from the cross

O vos omnes, qui transitis per viam
Attendite et videte si est dolor, sicut dolor meus 

Have I mentioned how cool I think it is that it always, always rains at the 3pm Good Friday mass, every single year? But, I think I’ve disappointed myself this Lent in a way. I haven’t actually made a conscious sacrifice, and well, that’s bad isn’t it. I should really stop taking God and this faith for granted. Anyhow, Good Friday mass was lovely, meaningful hymns and exhaustion on the part of the choir – singing throughout the veneration remains no mean feat. But it was beautiful. Then practice for easter sunday mass till evening, and Aunty Gin provided hot cross buns! Okay, it was my first time eating hot cross buns. Don’t laugh, I’m a deprived child.

On a lighter note, tomorrow’s easter sunday! (: To be spent with the family choir at Hannah’s house with little imps squealing and searching for chocolate eggs in the garden. Then at grandma’s for late easter lunch. Hahahaha yay

Sometimes, I feel totally clueless. I wonder what’s been going on with you & you in particular. But I only wonder. I feel like I’ve lost so many people along the way, and needless to say, the blame lies with me. Yet it unsettles me that I can’t bring myself to do anything about it because I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time. And as long as I have you, I’ll be okay. The security I’ve now found in you is such a treasure.

And to you, you were right. Not everyone’s like him. He’s different, or as I like to see it, special. Thank goodness for that. There’s something I want to prove to myself so badly, and I want it more than anything, tangible or intangible. That difference is what makes it possible. And it’s going to happen because I’m going to make it so.

Counting my blessings, you’re the biggest one.

To fight for you is all I’ve ever known

After nearly a month of not using the computer, signing into MSN, wordpress, facebook, or whatever else, I’m finally here posting again. There really isn’t anything great about internet usage after all is there.

1) DANCEWORKS

Here’s to SAGE – Jiahui, Nina, SamPang, Jewel, Amelia, Justine, Angie, Jiaher & Estelle. And our reserves Anne & Fariha. I really love you guys. On hindsight, this is has been the best danceworks ever, for me. I’ve never been in a group comprising members of four different levels, yet a group that evenually gelled together so well. Much laughter, less pressure, less expectations, no bitching, no cliques (those two were really firsts). The entire March hols spent in school, from morning to evening, group lunches at the coffee shops, sewing costumes & bonding with Sanguine & Static – I’d say danceworks 08 has been a good ride (: And as much as I can’t believe that I’m saying this, and though I couldn’t be more relieved that my schedule has finally freed up, I’M GOING TO MISS DANCING WITH YOU ALL EVERY SINGLE DAY.

Congratulations to Static: Energizer high-energy award
Congratulations to Sage : Best supported group award, Prelim A 3rd place
Congratulations to Sanguine: Prelim B 3rd place, GOING TO FINALS

IJ Dance <3
Hearts espescially to Tan Jiahui, the bestest Sage Mama ever!

2) HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY

Doralyn Chan (3rd March)
Catherine May Tang (13 March)
Lucas Ng (13 March)
Mike Tian (18 March)
Joe! (18 March)
Julienne Cheok (19 March)

Love love love love love love love, <3

The power of your love.

HAPPY SWEET SIXTEENTH <3
SAMANTHA WOON SER HWEE!

DESKPARTNER for the second year, I LOVE YOU. I swear swear swear, you are the best. Thank you for everything – for putting up with me when I’m cranky, for explaining stuff to me when I’m stupid/not paying attention, for just being there. For being the one person I can count on to always be you. You probably don’t realise this but, your company has meant so much to me, this year alone. When everyone else was being * & I felt so alone it seriously felt like you were the only saving grace to being in school. Yes, and I don’t think a blog post on your birthday is going to do you justice. You know how much you mean to me (:

-

Nothing’s greater than the rush that comes with your embrace
And in this world of loneliness I see your face

I don’t care what they say, I’m in love with you
They try to pull me away, but they don’t know the truth
My heart’s crippled by the vein that I keep on closing

It’s been the best 72 hours, after hearing what you had to say.
Feels like you’re all I have left, again. Stupid crappy days.
I’m not ever going to forget your promise (it really means everything to me) – so you better keep it. Smiley faces and hearts to you! Hahaha (:

The rush that comes with your embrace

Belated birthday wishes (22nd Feb)

HAPPY SWEET SIXTEENTH 
ALESIA GIAN CHIA YEE <3

HAPPY FAB FIFTEENTH
MAX HENG PIN :D

Alesia Gian, I love you. For the way you make me laugh with your retarded dances whenever I decide to stay up for recess, your amazingly hilarious scandals, the way you’re such a bitch but yet an awesome friend, for having never judged me in a way that’s hurt. Happy sixteenth, hope you had a great one!

Maxxxxx, the cutest cutey pie ever, I love the way always have a grin plastered on your smiley face. Even though I don’t know you well, you’re such a joy to be around! If only you knew how people envy your perpetual convival disposition (: Happy fifteenth!

Your promise means everything to me.

Did the captain of the Titanic cry?

Hello everybody, are you guys still alive and kicking, barely breathing?

Okay, what an exaggeration. These few days actually haven’t been too bad, despite the crap that makes life what it is. Yesterday in particular, I had two rather insightful conversations – one with Doralyn & Sam while supposedly staying back to help with lit drama props (sorry we didn’t do much), and another really long one with Nicho last night. Oh! And I went for morning run in the morning, since I miraculously got to school before 7am for the first time this year, and even more miraculously, did not have any last minute homework to copy. (: Made me feel accomplished man. Plus, we managed to get the money thing sorted out today! After frantic phonecalls peppered with vulgarities till bloody 3am, I couldn’t be more relieved.

Anyway, back to those two conversations.
Both of which led me to ponder two particular points,

1) How far can you go, before doing the right thing becomes the wrong thing. You know what, an inferiority complex just isn’t going to get you anywhere. It just brings out the bitch in you. To you: the game is all yours, it’s your own life you were screwing up all along. Hate to disappoint you, but I never learned to play. And ‘love is blind’ – that’s a load of crap. Love is not blind. It is those who think it is who choose to be blind.

2) As I wrote two posts ago (it’s locked now), I’m never going to be an idealist. And guess what? I’m never going to be ideal either. An ideal friend, girl, daughter, whatever else. In fact, right now, I’m going to be downright selfish. What was that line again, “treat others how you want to be treated”? Screw that. I’m going to treat you how you treat me. Yes, I’ll probably eventually regret it, but who cares? I don’t fear regret. Not in this way. It’s not going to stop me.

I don’t play nice and I don’t plan to either. And for what it’s worth, if you walk away, I’m not going to go after you.

You cut me open & I keep bleeding love

Firstly, this is awfully awfully overdue but

HAPPY SUGARY SEVENTEENTH

ANASTASIA GOANA BEENANA <3

You are the cutest little bundle of joy, ever, you bimbotic basketballer! I’m so so so so glad I went for the UK trip, and got to know you as well as all the other Tenners (:

Ena’s & Crescencia’s party was great. Espescially all the company, and the hanging by the waterside with Doralyn and Anne, hilarious prank calls. Hahahaha

Protected: Even heroes have the right to bleed

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